I'm proud to say that I am able to work out like a work horse once again. I can actually get through an entire work-out. Of course using lighter weights than before. Yesterday I did chest and legs. Today I did shoulders, triceps, forearms, side bends. I tried to do some abs but it was too much strain on my brain. Sometime this week I will do back and biceps.
It felt great to get the blood pumping in my legs. I think that helps with the weirdness i've been feeling in my legs.
Sunday, May 16, 2010
Friday, May 14, 2010
Left Leg Numb????
Lately I have been having trouble with either my left or right leg going numb when I am in bed sleeping. It feels like it is either numb or loss of blood circulation (I really cant describe it). A little moving around makes it go away. This can happen to either leg but never at the same time. It never happens when I am up in the day time. Although sometimes I get right sided weakness in my right leg, but that is nothing new and I feel is an issue separate and apart.
Last night as soon as I laid down to sleep, my left leg became numb. I was uncomfortable with it all night. It didn't go away with some adjustment, it just remained all night. Now I've been up since 5:30 am walking around. An hour later and my left leg still feels wooden. I am able to use it like normal however there is less sensation. I took off my socks and ran my finger up and down the bottom of my feet. The right foot had normal sensation. The left foot had little sensation, a lot less than my right foot.
Now I am thinking:
- Do I have a blood clot that is causing poor circulation
OR
- Is the residual tumor affecting my left side now? (My neurosurgeon told me that although my tumor is on the left you would think it would only affect the right side of my body, but it can affect the left side as well.) Isn't it my luck that it happens the day after I see my Neurosurgeon? Of course it is.
I don't know what the heck I did to deserve all this hell that I am going through. I am TERRIFIED. I can't stand living like this anymore. It is torture. I am really in mental anguish. I will go to work this morning. At least my right leg is working so I can drive my car safely to work.
The thoughts that plague me constantly are wearing me down. And I know some of you are saying that I should stop thinking so much. But weird scary stuff is going on in my life. Surgery is pending and I just may be awake for it. I have this residual tumor in my head that is in a life threatening location and I am having numbness in my left leg all of a sudden (I don't know what I am feeling in my left leg but it is a sensation that I have never felt before). It has always been my right side that is affected.
I am at the point of just surrendering to what ever is going to happen. I can't control anything. I am just going to live fearlessly. Whatever happens, happens.
I just can't bear to live like this anymore. Like a scared abused dog cowering in the corner afraid to venture out.
It is not easy to just "think of something else" and "not to worry too much about it". Matter of fact I think it is down right impossible. I think the best thing for me is to just distract myself. That is the only thing that seems to work. Like playing with my dog, or spending the day at the park with family.
Alas, after the distraction is gone, the fear is always there, with it's Cheshire Cat smile, always there to welcome me back home to the wretched underworld of vexation that has now become my world.
Last night as soon as I laid down to sleep, my left leg became numb. I was uncomfortable with it all night. It didn't go away with some adjustment, it just remained all night. Now I've been up since 5:30 am walking around. An hour later and my left leg still feels wooden. I am able to use it like normal however there is less sensation. I took off my socks and ran my finger up and down the bottom of my feet. The right foot had normal sensation. The left foot had little sensation, a lot less than my right foot.
Now I am thinking:
- Do I have a blood clot that is causing poor circulation
OR
- Is the residual tumor affecting my left side now? (My neurosurgeon told me that although my tumor is on the left you would think it would only affect the right side of my body, but it can affect the left side as well.) Isn't it my luck that it happens the day after I see my Neurosurgeon? Of course it is.
I don't know what the heck I did to deserve all this hell that I am going through. I am TERRIFIED. I can't stand living like this anymore. It is torture. I am really in mental anguish. I will go to work this morning. At least my right leg is working so I can drive my car safely to work.
The thoughts that plague me constantly are wearing me down. And I know some of you are saying that I should stop thinking so much. But weird scary stuff is going on in my life. Surgery is pending and I just may be awake for it. I have this residual tumor in my head that is in a life threatening location and I am having numbness in my left leg all of a sudden (I don't know what I am feeling in my left leg but it is a sensation that I have never felt before). It has always been my right side that is affected.
I am at the point of just surrendering to what ever is going to happen. I can't control anything. I am just going to live fearlessly. Whatever happens, happens.
I just can't bear to live like this anymore. Like a scared abused dog cowering in the corner afraid to venture out.
It is not easy to just "think of something else" and "not to worry too much about it". Matter of fact I think it is down right impossible. I think the best thing for me is to just distract myself. That is the only thing that seems to work. Like playing with my dog, or spending the day at the park with family.
Alas, after the distraction is gone, the fear is always there, with it's Cheshire Cat smile, always there to welcome me back home to the wretched underworld of vexation that has now become my world.
Thursday, May 13, 2010
Brain Surgery While Awake
I am seriously considering having this next brain surgery while awake. The surgeon can know what parts of the brain are safe to touch and not to touch by asking you during surgery to move certain body parts.
There is nothing I wont do to preserve the best quality of life.
There is nothing I wont do to preserve the best quality of life.
The Neurosurgeon Appt of 5/13/10
Well here it is:
- My surgery is tentatively scheduled for June 23, 2010.
- There is no tumor regrowth.
- There is residual tumor in a dangerous spot which needs to be removed.
- It will be hard to get to.
- It will be a 4 to 5 hour surgery.
- My neuro is confident he can get all the residual safely.
- He will patch up the hole in my skull in the same surgery.
- I will be in the hospital after the surgery for about a week.
- Recovery time is approximately 2 months if all goes well.
- May need some physical therapy.
I asked my Neuro if I would be alright and he had to tell me that there were risks as there are with any brain surgery. He mentioned somethings like I may have right sided weakness and problems remembering words. To what degree, it's anyone's guess. Of course anything can happen. It's the brain. He also said to me "We can do the surgery while your awake". He wasn't joking. I told him I would do whatever would be best for my life and the success of the surgery. I guess he saw the look of terror in my eyes. But he said that it wont be necessary. They are going to put me under.
I know what its like coming out of surgery and it sucks. Your in pain and nauseous and you cant do anything for yourself and you cant really move even if your really uncomfortable among many other things. And the best thing is you get to wonder what works and doesn't work. If I can wonder when I get out of this surgery then I will be happy because that means i'm not a vegetable. You ask yourself all the questions that one would ask in my predicament.
I'm literally banking on everything going well. I have a mortgage already approved and intend to close on a condo on June 1st. I tell ya, i'm really livin' on the edge! And you know what, IT FEELS GOOD. It's also terrifying all at the same time.
I've never been a gambling (wo)man, but look at me now! It's like playing Russian Roulette! Are ya feelin' lucky? Yeah, i'll try my luck!
- My surgery is tentatively scheduled for June 23, 2010.
- There is no tumor regrowth.
- There is residual tumor in a dangerous spot which needs to be removed.
- It will be hard to get to.
- It will be a 4 to 5 hour surgery.
- My neuro is confident he can get all the residual safely.
- He will patch up the hole in my skull in the same surgery.
- I will be in the hospital after the surgery for about a week.
- Recovery time is approximately 2 months if all goes well.
- May need some physical therapy.
I asked my Neuro if I would be alright and he had to tell me that there were risks as there are with any brain surgery. He mentioned somethings like I may have right sided weakness and problems remembering words. To what degree, it's anyone's guess. Of course anything can happen. It's the brain. He also said to me "We can do the surgery while your awake". He wasn't joking. I told him I would do whatever would be best for my life and the success of the surgery. I guess he saw the look of terror in my eyes. But he said that it wont be necessary. They are going to put me under.
I know what its like coming out of surgery and it sucks. Your in pain and nauseous and you cant do anything for yourself and you cant really move even if your really uncomfortable among many other things. And the best thing is you get to wonder what works and doesn't work. If I can wonder when I get out of this surgery then I will be happy because that means i'm not a vegetable. You ask yourself all the questions that one would ask in my predicament.
I'm literally banking on everything going well. I have a mortgage already approved and intend to close on a condo on June 1st. I tell ya, i'm really livin' on the edge! And you know what, IT FEELS GOOD. It's also terrifying all at the same time.
I've never been a gambling (wo)man, but look at me now! It's like playing Russian Roulette! Are ya feelin' lucky? Yeah, i'll try my luck!
RAGE
Well today is my appointment at noon to go see the Neurosurgeon to see what my destiny will be on the chopping block. I'm f-ing terrified and utterly depressed already. I'm scared it's going to be more bad news. I haven't left my Neurosurgeons office once without crying. I'm panicking. I'm f-ing tired. I just want this to be over with already and live the normal life with normal problems that i deserve to live. I'm so pissed. I'm f-ing angry. I feel like rageing. I feel like taking a sledge hammer to a car and axing down a house. I was able to do whatever I wanted to do before this. And now I cant even make it through an entire workout. I've lost so much. I know im still alive and have a lot to be thankful for but dammit i'm aloud to be angry! and angry I am! Im so angry i could spit. And they're so passé about it at the doctors office. i want to spit in their faces too! I dont even want to get dressed today. I've been waiting for results this long, minus well wait till the end of time. I don't care anymore. F-it. I'll go but I don't care anymore. I'm numb at this point. A rageing animal is exactly what I am for having been so mistreated in every aspect of my life. Something somewhere has to have pity on me.
And to all you freakin' normies who have told me "well your lucky considering" - think of what a stupid remark that is to tell someone that is going through something that you couldn't even imagine or comprehend or be strong enough to handle or survive. That is the MOST selfish thing anyone has EVER said to me.
F-ing normies. WEAKLINGS THAT TURN THEIR BACKS BECAUSE THEY'RE TOO TERRIFIED TO WATCH THE TRAIN WRECK THAT IS MY LIFE!!!!!! YOU COULD NOT SURVIVE THIS BRAIN TERRORISM! YOU COULD NOT WALK A DAY IN MY SHOES. MOST PEOPLE COULD NOT CARRY THE HUGE BURDEN OF THEIR HEALTH BEING COMPROMISED, BEING EMOTIONALLY ABUSED BY THEIR FIANCE WHILE BEING ALREADY STRESSED OUT WITH SEIZURES AND BRAIN SURGERY RECOVERY, SUBSEQUENTLY BEING KICKED OUT OF YOUR OWN HOME, BE HEART BROKEN, CONTINUE TO FUNCTION NORMALLY AT MY FULL TIME JOB, LIVE ON TOP OF ALL THEIR STUFF IN THEIR SISTERS HOUSE, HAVE TO GET A TRUCK AND MOVE ALL 7 YEARS OF STUFF OUT ALL WITHIN 2 WEEKS, FIND A PLACE FOR YOUR DOG IN A DAYS NOTICE, GET A REAL ESTATE AGENT, FIND A PLACE TO PURCHASE, GET APPROVED FOR A MORTGAGE AND CLOSE BETWEEN BRAIN SURGERIES.......REALLY? YOU COULD HANDLE THAT! PLEASE....I AM A FORCE TO BE RECKONED WITH....SO BE AFRAID, BE VERY AFRAID. You know what that is called, AN IRON WILL and life lessons that will serve me so well throughout the rest of my life. I KNOW A LOT OF PEOPLE THAT NEED TO GROW A SET...AND GROW THE F UP!
I'M DONE.
P.S. MY BIRTHDAY IS TOMORROW DAMMIT.
And to all you freakin' normies who have told me "well your lucky considering" - think of what a stupid remark that is to tell someone that is going through something that you couldn't even imagine or comprehend or be strong enough to handle or survive. That is the MOST selfish thing anyone has EVER said to me.
F-ing normies. WEAKLINGS THAT TURN THEIR BACKS BECAUSE THEY'RE TOO TERRIFIED TO WATCH THE TRAIN WRECK THAT IS MY LIFE!!!!!! YOU COULD NOT SURVIVE THIS BRAIN TERRORISM! YOU COULD NOT WALK A DAY IN MY SHOES. MOST PEOPLE COULD NOT CARRY THE HUGE BURDEN OF THEIR HEALTH BEING COMPROMISED, BEING EMOTIONALLY ABUSED BY THEIR FIANCE WHILE BEING ALREADY STRESSED OUT WITH SEIZURES AND BRAIN SURGERY RECOVERY, SUBSEQUENTLY BEING KICKED OUT OF YOUR OWN HOME, BE HEART BROKEN, CONTINUE TO FUNCTION NORMALLY AT MY FULL TIME JOB, LIVE ON TOP OF ALL THEIR STUFF IN THEIR SISTERS HOUSE, HAVE TO GET A TRUCK AND MOVE ALL 7 YEARS OF STUFF OUT ALL WITHIN 2 WEEKS, FIND A PLACE FOR YOUR DOG IN A DAYS NOTICE, GET A REAL ESTATE AGENT, FIND A PLACE TO PURCHASE, GET APPROVED FOR A MORTGAGE AND CLOSE BETWEEN BRAIN SURGERIES.......REALLY? YOU COULD HANDLE THAT! PLEASE....I AM A FORCE TO BE RECKONED WITH....SO BE AFRAID, BE VERY AFRAID. You know what that is called, AN IRON WILL and life lessons that will serve me so well throughout the rest of my life. I KNOW A LOT OF PEOPLE THAT NEED TO GROW A SET...AND GROW THE F UP!
I'M DONE.
P.S. MY BIRTHDAY IS TOMORROW DAMMIT.
Wednesday, May 5, 2010
Good News
I've been approved for my mortgage with Wells Fargo! I didn't doubt it with an 811 credit score....he he he....I brag. I intend to close and set up my new place before my surgery. Hopefully recovery shouldn't be more than 2 months.
This Friday, May 7th I go to get my MRI.
Then on Thursday, May 13th I will see my Neurosurgeon at which point he will tell me what he sees in the MRI and will give me a definite date for surgery.
That's all for now folks.
This Friday, May 7th I go to get my MRI.
Then on Thursday, May 13th I will see my Neurosurgeon at which point he will tell me what he sees in the MRI and will give me a definite date for surgery.
That's all for now folks.
Saturday, April 24, 2010
Puzzle Pieces
I just wish all the pieces would fall already. I'm tired of the pieces floating above my head knowing one could possibly come crashing down on me at anytime, nerve wrecking really. I know, the only way I am tolerating this hell is by having patience and faith in God.
My life is such a mess right now. I have lost my nest and my significant other. I'm so tired of being uncomfortable. I just want a peaceful existence with the normal challenges sprinkled in here and there for good measure. I'm so tired of waiting for something to change.
(Shrugging shoulders followed by putting head down)
My life is such a mess right now. I have lost my nest and my significant other. I'm so tired of being uncomfortable. I just want a peaceful existence with the normal challenges sprinkled in here and there for good measure. I'm so tired of waiting for something to change.
(Shrugging shoulders followed by putting head down)
Sunday, April 18, 2010
Split in Two
Sorry I haven't updated in a while but I've been dealing with another drama in my life. My fiancé and I have called it quits. We are separated. I have moved as much as I can out of his house. I have a lot more to get out as I was living in his house for 6.5 years. When one becomes really ill and one becomes the caretaker, well lets just say that can reek havoc on a relationship.
So it has been even more stressful than usual. I'm very strong though. Very strong. I am living out of a shoe box with my sister "Bizzy" at her house in East Brunswick. Thank God for my sisters. Thank God for Bizzy and her wonderful husband Andrew for letting me crash at their home. I get to see my 1 year old nephew everyday so that is a great joy.
Well I found a nice condo that is 8 minutes away from my sister Bizzy and 15 minutes from my job. I made an offer on it and now all I have to do is get approved for a mortgage. So I am hoping that goes through. Things are going to be tight but manageable. I am excited to live alone and have my own investment. I am looking forward to building equity. I feel this is the best time to buy. As they say, "buy low, sell high". Not to mention I will be getting the $8K tax credit.
So it has been even more stressful than usual. I'm very strong though. Very strong. I am living out of a shoe box with my sister "Bizzy" at her house in East Brunswick. Thank God for my sisters. Thank God for Bizzy and her wonderful husband Andrew for letting me crash at their home. I get to see my 1 year old nephew everyday so that is a great joy.
Well I found a nice condo that is 8 minutes away from my sister Bizzy and 15 minutes from my job. I made an offer on it and now all I have to do is get approved for a mortgage. So I am hoping that goes through. Things are going to be tight but manageable. I am excited to live alone and have my own investment. I am looking forward to building equity. I feel this is the best time to buy. As they say, "buy low, sell high". Not to mention I will be getting the $8K tax credit.
Sunday, March 28, 2010
Having Good Times
Hello all,
I must say I have been feeling awesome as of late. I went to the gym for the first time in a long time and it felt great because that is one of my favorite things in the world. I wasn't able to do my usual workout, but it was a good start.
Today is the first day that i'm not feeling so hot. But I feel that it is nothing that rest cannot resolve.
Also I went to a wedding last weekend and was able to dance all night. I do have some serious anxiety at times. However, distractions seem to dispel that anxiety, like having friends, family and my dog around to make me feel comfortable and relaxed.
I must say I have been feeling awesome as of late. I went to the gym for the first time in a long time and it felt great because that is one of my favorite things in the world. I wasn't able to do my usual workout, but it was a good start.
Today is the first day that i'm not feeling so hot. But I feel that it is nothing that rest cannot resolve.
Also I went to a wedding last weekend and was able to dance all night. I do have some serious anxiety at times. However, distractions seem to dispel that anxiety, like having friends, family and my dog around to make me feel comfortable and relaxed.
Thursday, March 18, 2010
The Anticipation is Killing me!
Well what I have to look forward to:
- MRI Results in May 2010
- Whatever the results may be it will mean:
a. Surgery in the month of may
b. Getting my head cut even further back then the original incision.
c. Having additional skull cut and removed and replaced with some molding clay
d. Having the surgeon fish around in my brain for rogue tumor pieces (the Neurosurgeon mentioned that he had to leave some of the tumor behind from the 1st surgery because it was in a vital area of the brain that is too dangerous to touch :-) so he is cutting additional skull to possibly reach in that dangerous area from a better angle.
e. Guessing what is going to function and not function on my body or in my mind after surgery, if I will be lucid, If I will be myself, If I will be disabled. If I will survive the surgery, If I will have a good quality of life, If I will live.
f. Wondering what I will be in for if I'm lucky enough to make it to recovery because recovery is always fun.
Is that enough of a load for someone to be carrying on their plate? I get to carry that poison for thought around for an additional 2 months! I sure hope that I dont murder someone within these 2 months because I am really stressed. I feel like these are my last days. I'm going insane. I'm going out of my mind. I'm going kookoo. I'm miserable.
To all of my friends and supporters who read this, I give you a big sincere Thank you. I appreciate every single comment of encouragement and support that you leave here on my blog, send me in an email, in a phone conversation or even a visit.
To all you friends (and all you cowards know who you are) who have decided to drop me because you were too scared to ride out the rough waters with me SCREW YOU! Well, I really don't mean that.....but have fun living with that decision for the rest of your life! and may your friends never abandon you when the chips are down like you have done to me.
GOODBYE!
- MRI Results in May 2010
- Whatever the results may be it will mean:
a. Surgery in the month of may
b. Getting my head cut even further back then the original incision.
c. Having additional skull cut and removed and replaced with some molding clay
d. Having the surgeon fish around in my brain for rogue tumor pieces (the Neurosurgeon mentioned that he had to leave some of the tumor behind from the 1st surgery because it was in a vital area of the brain that is too dangerous to touch :-) so he is cutting additional skull to possibly reach in that dangerous area from a better angle.
e. Guessing what is going to function and not function on my body or in my mind after surgery, if I will be lucid, If I will be myself, If I will be disabled. If I will survive the surgery, If I will have a good quality of life, If I will live.
f. Wondering what I will be in for if I'm lucky enough to make it to recovery because recovery is always fun.
Is that enough of a load for someone to be carrying on their plate? I get to carry that poison for thought around for an additional 2 months! I sure hope that I dont murder someone within these 2 months because I am really stressed. I feel like these are my last days. I'm going insane. I'm going out of my mind. I'm going kookoo. I'm miserable.
To all of my friends and supporters who read this, I give you a big sincere Thank you. I appreciate every single comment of encouragement and support that you leave here on my blog, send me in an email, in a phone conversation or even a visit.
To all you friends (and all you cowards know who you are) who have decided to drop me because you were too scared to ride out the rough waters with me SCREW YOU! Well, I really don't mean that.....but have fun living with that decision for the rest of your life! and may your friends never abandon you when the chips are down like you have done to me.
GOODBYE!
Saturday, March 13, 2010
and the plot thickens
Well another appointment that didn't go my way. I saw my Neurosurgeon on Thursday, 3/11/10. He looked at my latest MRI and concluded one of two things...1) that there is new tumor regrowth or 2) there is residual (left over tumor from the 1st surgery). So he said that he was going to have to go back and tinker with my brain again and he may have to go back further cutting additional skull. In the same surgery he will replace the missing bone flap (plug up the hole in my head). I wasn't expecting more disappointing news, I was expecting to hear OK all looks good and i'm just gonna cap you off and I dont have to touch your brain. I dont know how long the recovery is going to be and I dont know WTF.
It took me so long to write this update because I was so upset. I'm tired, worn and weary. I will continue to pray to God for this final surgery to be the last one. He said later down the road, IF there is tumor regrowth I will have to get radiation. I have to get another MRI in May and will bring it to him to look at on May 13th 2010. He will be able to determine if it is left over tumor or new tumor regrowth. My surgery will follow immediately in May 2010.
I WANT TO LIVE A BETTER QUALITY OF LIFE.... I WANT TO LIVE PERIOD..... OH AND DONT FORGET, MOST IMPORTANTLY I WANT MY FREAKIN' GORGEOUS HAIR BACK.... I'M A FREAKIN GIRL FOR * SAKE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
P.S. I dont want to hear ANYBODY saying, "well at least your alive, oh and you have so much to be thankful for" or any other obvious things that I already know. Bottom line...IM ANGRY AND FRUSTRATED! THIS SUCKS!
It took me so long to write this update because I was so upset. I'm tired, worn and weary. I will continue to pray to God for this final surgery to be the last one. He said later down the road, IF there is tumor regrowth I will have to get radiation. I have to get another MRI in May and will bring it to him to look at on May 13th 2010. He will be able to determine if it is left over tumor or new tumor regrowth. My surgery will follow immediately in May 2010.
I WANT TO LIVE A BETTER QUALITY OF LIFE.... I WANT TO LIVE PERIOD..... OH AND DONT FORGET, MOST IMPORTANTLY I WANT MY FREAKIN' GORGEOUS HAIR BACK.... I'M A FREAKIN GIRL FOR * SAKE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
P.S. I dont want to hear ANYBODY saying, "well at least your alive, oh and you have so much to be thankful for" or any other obvious things that I already know. Bottom line...IM ANGRY AND FRUSTRATED! THIS SUCKS!
Saturday, March 6, 2010
Great Saturday
I had a great day today. I was able to go to several stores today and get many things done. My leg is working fine even with the slight numbness. The distraction helps a lot. I even took my Coco on a long walk. I really enjoy life. I am very greatful to be alive and cherish my life, my family and friends.
Scary Thursday
On Thursday around 4:00pm I got a global headache as in it was not concentrated in one spot. I took some aspirin to alleviate it. Then around 6pm my right foot and most of my leg went numb and I felt like it was going to give out on me. Anxiety and panic set in as it took me back to that fateful day of June 15 when this whole mess started. It was numb from 6pm to about 10pm. Even my R arm felt slightly numb but nothing like my leg and foot. It was so messed up because I couldn't feel where my foot was going to to land. (picture going up and down stairs with one of your legs numb...not fun.)
Friday was a better day although most of the numbness subsided there was still some there. My leg still doesn't feel normal, it feels slightly compromised. I am just disappointed because I haven't had numbness that bad since before December and I felt great for half of January and the entire month of February. I did not have any numbness at all for that period of time. I thought to myself, "look at me, i'm on the mend afterall, the worst is behind me." Well now i'm not so sure about that. Just another evening of sheer terror. I do notice that any episodes that happen tend to occur at the end of the day. I dont think i'll ever get used to this.
Friday was a better day although most of the numbness subsided there was still some there. My leg still doesn't feel normal, it feels slightly compromised. I am just disappointed because I haven't had numbness that bad since before December and I felt great for half of January and the entire month of February. I did not have any numbness at all for that period of time. I thought to myself, "look at me, i'm on the mend afterall, the worst is behind me." Well now i'm not so sure about that. Just another evening of sheer terror. I do notice that any episodes that happen tend to occur at the end of the day. I dont think i'll ever get used to this.
Monday, March 1, 2010
Neurosurgeon canceled on me
On the way to work this morning my neurosurgeon's office calls and asks me if I could come into see the doc today instead of tomorrow. I said no it's too late for that. So anyway I am rescheduled for next Thursday, 3/11/10 to see my Neurosurgeon. I am not anxious about it because I believe I know what he is going to say. He is probably going to say lets wait another 4 to 6 months for you to get another MRI and then we'll take it from there.
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